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Habits

How To Get Good At Practically Anything Using The Sweet Spot

May 7, 2020 by Danny Miranda Leave a Comment

I naturally sucked.

Instruments. Athletics. Standardized tests.

A common thought when I was younger: “Oh, I’ll never be good at that. What’s the point in trying?” 

Okay, maybe I wasn’t completely helpless. But I believed I couldn’t do anything to improve my situation (Carol Dweck calls this a fixed mindset. The opposite of this is, well, a growth mindset, where you believe you can improve your situation.)

Activity after activity. Start, quit, start, quit.

I always quit before I could make any progress. I mean, could you blame me? It’s not fun doing something you think you suck at and that (you believe) you will always suck at.

But then, there was one activity that changed everything.

I came across lifting weights.

Yeah, I wasn’t strong at first (who is… maybe The Rock?). Yeah, I was weak and frail. But it didn’t matter.

Because I found the Sweet Spot.

Introducing: The Sweet Spot

We value what is difficult to achieve.

But here’s the tricky part:

It can’t be too hard.

Especially when we’re starting out.

Imagine if when playing basketball, every time you shot you missed. Every single time? You’d stop playing. (On the other side, if you scored every time, you’d hate it as well.)

If we decide an activity is too difficult, we quit. Like all the instruments I tried from the ages of 11 to 15. Because I could not imagine a world in which I was good at the saxophone, I stopped doing it. Even though we could become great if we didn’t stop, still… we quit.

So what is the Sweet Spot?

The Sweet Spot is the place the activity isn’t too easy or difficult. But most importantly, we must know we are improving, and we must enjoy the feeling.

After my first few weeks of weightlifting, I got stronger. My form improved. I was lifting heavier weights.

Here’s where the breakthrough happened.

I realized, “Oh, if I keep this up for 10+ years, I’m going to be really good. And besides, this is really good for my body and mind. So I’m going to keep doing it.”

The improvement was objective. It wasn’t easy. And it wasn’t difficult.

It hit the Sweet Spot.

The Sweet Spot is similar to flow. When we’re in flow, we:

  • Get more enjoyment out of the activity
  • Learn faster 
  • Are more productive
  • Feel more creative

The Sweet Spot is that perfect area where we don’t feel as if we suck. And we don’t feel as if we’re too good.

Anyone can lift weights because the activity has “beginner, intermediate, advanced” built-in. 

Someone who is starting out can use their body weight. An intermediate can progress to dumbbells and barbells. And an expert can add even more weight to their movements.

Meaning: if you “suck” at the beginning (like I did), you can still improve in some way. Which makes the activity fun, rewarding, and challenging.

The Mastery Curve: How To Find The Sweet Spot Throughout  The Journey 

“A black belt is a white belt who never quit.”

When you begin an activity, you objectively suck. But fear not, the longer you pursue it – while trying to improve – the better you will get.

What’s more important than whether you suck or not?

Finding the Sweet Spot.

In other words, your own perspective matters.

Is the activity is fun? Do you think you’re improving? Are you getting recognition from the outside world?

If yes, you’ve found the Sweet Spot.

Note: The timeline I’ve outlined below doesn’t hold true for every activity. But it’s a pretty good gauge for random, difficult activities.

The “Newbie Gains!” Stage: Your First ~6-12 Months

When you are a beginner, you can make rapid advancements over short periods of time.

In weightlifting, “newbie gains” are when you can add the most amount of muscle in the shortest amount of time. In your first year of lifting properly, you can gain as much as 20 pounds of muscle. For someone who has been lifting for 10+ years, this is nearly impossible to do.

It’s almost as if life has programmed this in, giving you a reason to stay with the activity.

How to find the Sweet Spot: Track your progress by an internal metric. Start a streak. Make it something you can fully control. If you compare yourself to someone who has been practicing the craft for much longer, you probably will get upset and miss the Sweet Spot.

The “Oh, I’m Actually Kinda Good At This” Stage, Part I: Years ~1-3

In this stage, you look back on your previous self.

It is slightly embarrassing.

You’ve come a long way, in what seems like a short amount of time.

You’re also noticing it’s becoming harder and harder to make improvements. Your rate of growth decreases. You’re still learning, but you’ve already mastered the basics.

In order to make the same improvement jump as you did in the first year, you need to spend more time on the activity.

So that’s what you need to do to find the Sweet Spot.

How to find the Sweet Spot: Make the activity more difficult. Add resistance.

The “There’s So Much More To Learn Stage”, Part II: Years 3-10

At this point, you’re at an in-between stage. Most people do not pursue activities for 3+ years, so you’re better than most.

You can teach what you know to someone who is a complete beginner. 

But someone who has been practicing for 10+ or even 20+ years can still teach you a lot.

Instead of making progress by day, week, or month, you’re now measuring improvements in years.

How to find the Sweet Spot: Instruct a beginner.

The “This Is Fun Stage”: Years 10+

If you have been practicing an activity for 10+ years, there’s an incredibly high chance you attain mastery in it. 

Meaning? 

You can have fun with your skills. But more likely? You will want to explore some other areas as a beginner again.

How to find the Sweet Spot: Have fun with your skills. Become a beginner again.


It turns out sucking isn’t so bad after all.

Thanks to Dan Hunt and Stew Fortier for reading drafts of this.

Filed Under: Goals, Habits

Introducing: Streaks

April 16, 2020 by Danny Miranda Leave a Comment

This website is about you. It’s about optimizing your habits. And you becoming the best version of yourself.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You (and I) have heard everyone say that.

How can I prove it?

Introducing: Streaks

There have been two major themes when I’ve been at my best in life (“firing on all cylinders” as the kids like to say):

  1. I was on a streak — doing the same habit(s) day after day. Building a routine.
  2. I was accountable for my streak — other people were aware I was building this streak. I didn’t want to let myself down (or them!).

So why not use this website as a way to create that process for myself and YOU.

Here’s how it works:

  1. You email danny [at] dannymiranda [dot] com with the streak you want to create. Title: Streak: [Insert Your Habit Here]
  2. Include your social media handle (or your website) and time zone.
  3. Every day, respond to your initial email and say you’ve completed your task. If you fail to respond to the thread each day, your streak will be removed. You have until 11:59pm to report your submission. If you report you’ve completed your streak at midnight, this will NOT count. You can submit a new one any time you’d like.
  4. Streaks will be updated at 3 p.m. EST the following day at dannymiranda.com/streaks – you can track your progress (and others) there!

What streak should you try?

This is about what you’re trying to accomplish right now.

It could be as simple as one minute of meditation. It could be 75HARD. It could be 10 pages of reading. It could be waking up every day at the same time. The possibilities are endless in terms of ways to improve yourself.

Here are a couple of recommendations:

  • Make it something you can control (“10 minutes meditation” > “Feel more peaceful”)
  • Make it something you can measure (“45 minute workout” > “Workout”)
  • Make it an action, not a result (“Clean diet” > “Lose 20 pounds”)

Why Streaks?

If you want to change your life, change your habits.

A lot of people want to change their life. But they fail to change their habits because they don’t (1) build momentum by creating a streak and (2) are not accountable in public if they fail. (I’ve been there too many times.)

Streaks changes that.

You are publicly incentivized to stay on the top of the leaderboard. Every day you continue to build your streak, you will be changing your identity (and changing your life). You will also have an updated spot on the leaderboard.

The more reasons you have to do a habit, the more likely you will be to do it — even when you don’t feel like it (which will create discipline). Soon enough, you’re someone who does what they need to do, even when they don’t feel like doing it.

I’ve experimented with all types of ways to improve. But I’ve found the best way to get better is by building momentum while being accountable to others.

Why am I doing this?

The goal of this website is to build a community of people who are in pursuit of a better version. I am interested in getting to know people who build positive habits. I want to talk to these people. I want to learn from these people. “These people” could be you.

What if you lie?

The only person you’re hurting is yourself.

In Summary

  1. Shoot me an email at danny [at] dannymiranda [dot] com with the habit you want to track.
  2. Title of email: Streak: [Insert Your Habit Here]
  3. Include social media or website.
  4. Send me an email every day by midnight (your time!) saying you completed your task.
  5. Track yours (and others) streaks on this page.

To your success,

Danny

Filed Under: Goals, Habits

Medium-Term Goals

April 13, 2020 by Danny Miranda Leave a Comment

Have you ever had a massive goal but then took no action on it?

There is one big reason why I believe people don’t even attempt a goal.

The goal seems too big.

Set Huge Goals?

Common advice:

Set massive goals.

It’s typical to hear someone say… “You can accomplish anything you set your mind to.” And while this is an important mindset to harness – especially when doing difficult things – it can seem almost patronizing if you haven’t even started your journey.

Take an individual who is trying to get into running.

Let’s say it’s difficult to run around the block without getting winded. But you hear people say, “Make your goal huge!”

So, you decide your goal is going to be to run an ultramarathon.

One question you could ask is: “How am I supposed to set a goal of running an ultramarathon if I can’t even do a lap around my block?”

That’s a great question.

And my answer to that is: “You shouldn’t… if the huge goal demotivates you. If it excites you, carry on.”

When you set goals so big, so far away from your current reality, it’s easy to look at that reality as impossibility. Because it is impossible. Right now.

The truth is setting a goal of running an ultramarathon might push you in the opposite direction. It might paralyze you from taking action in the day to day.

This is the same for any type of massive goal.

But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t set it.

So, change your focus.

Notre Dame PLAY LIKE A CHAMPION TODAY sign

Should I Focus on the Day-to-Day?

One way to do that is to just think about that day or that week.

Notre Dame football is known for a phrase:

“Play Like A Champion Today”

Today.

There’s no reason to worry about if you didn’t go running yesterday.

Instead of thinking about the mountain you’re going to climb, think about the next step. If you can take a single step, you can keep going.

The reason this works is because it is inherently practical.

Your goal is to win the moment. You can’t win that moment by focusing on yesterday or tomorrow. In order to get better, to get to where you want to go… you need to lock in on that single day.

Although this is good advice, I believe it’s incomplete.

The Notre Dame football team can play like a champion today because they have the long-term goal of winning the College Football Playoff. They already put the practice on a daily basis.

The reason “Play Like A Champion Today” works is because it narrows their focus to what they can control – that day.

But if you haven’t started your journey, or you’re just getting started…

There’s something missing from the equation that most people don’t talk about.

That is…

Medium-Term Goals

Everyone talks about short-term goals (daily or weekly). Everyone talks about long term-goals (the big win).

These are both important.

But from my experience, when you’re just getting started, “medium-term goals” are the best way to get from where you are to where you want to be.

What do I mean by “medium term goals”?

These are goals that help you connect the day and years. They are the goals in between the short and long term. Hence the name. Medium.

For example, let’s go back to the running example. You know on the day-to-day, you want to run. You know in the long term, you wanted to be an ultramarathoner.

But what’s something that helps connect the short-term goal with the long-term goal?

It just so happens there’s a 5K Run in your area in 12 weeks.

That’s your medium-term goal.

“I will run a 5K race in 12 weeks” would be a perfect medium-term goal.

It helps give you a vision for where you want to be. You can see how your daily actions will lead you to where you want to go. And it helps connect your aspirations of long-distance running to the day-to-day.

The medium-term goal makes sense because it is practical. You can wrap your head around it.

Eventually, you’re going to complete your medium-term goal though.

What Should You Do After the Medium-Term Goal Is Complete?

Set a new medium-term goal.

In the above example, it could be as simple as running a 10K in a few months away. Take the next step up. Or it could be a half-marathon.

The medium-term goal (5K in 12 weeks) is NOT the long-term goal. That’s where it’s easy to make the mistake – and not follow through with your plan of becoming an ultramarathoner.

Feel good about accomplishing your goal. Be happy and proud of yourself. Then go to the next step.

Short, Medium, and Long-Term Are All Necessary

If you don’t have short, medium, and long-term goals, it’s much more difficult to stay with a habit.

If you only focused on the day-to-day, you’d start running one day.

“Wow, this is fun!”

You’d get excited because it was a new activity. Then, you might quit after it got difficult because you had nothing to look forward to.

If you only focused on the long term, you’d start running because you had this big goal.

“Wow, I’m going to be an ultramarathoner one day!”

You’d be excited to take some steps to achieve it initially. And then you’d stop once you realized how hard it actually was.

Let’s imagine you had the short and medium goals but didn’t have the long-term goals. You’d run daily, complete your 5K and stop running. You would need a longer-term goal to keep pushing you forward.

If you had a medium-term and long-term goal but had no short-term actions, you’d never actually get your butt off the couch.

When Your Reward Is the Action (When You Don’t Need Medium Term Goals)

Are medium term goals always necessary? Are goals always necessary at all?

Here’s my theory: when you’ve been doing an activity for a while, medium-term and long-term goals will still help motivate your behavior, but you’ll find the process of doing the activity turns out to be the reward.

When you can find joy in doing the activity, you find less need for goals.

And that should be the level we all strive for, right?

To get to a point where doing the activity itself is the reward.

Summary

  1. Setting huge goals can lead you to paralysis by analysis. They can demotivate you and eventually hurt you when you’re first starting out.
  2. Daily goals, focusing on what you can control, are good but insufficient.
  3. Long term goals are beneficial as well but setting them without medium term goals can be costly.
  4. Medium-term goals are goals that connect your short term and long term. They are neither daily actions nor are they the “end state” you’re hoping to achieve.
  5. If you’ve completed your first medium-term goal, you should set another one to build momentum.
  6. Eventually, you get to the point where the action becomes the reward.

Filed Under: Goals, Habits

How To Build Your Morning Routine & Control Your Life Using Linking

April 9, 2020 by Danny Miranda 1 Comment

I sat down for my daily meditation.

After my mind settled into nothing, I quickly thought of Naval.

I thought about Naval talking to Joe Rogan about meditation. I thought about Naval not doing any speaking engagements, wondering if that gave him more time to focus on his thoughts. I thought about Naval’s 60-day meditation challenge. I thought about what Naval would think about me doing a 10-minute meditation instead of his typical 60-minute session.

As I was watching myself think, I laughed.

It was clear I linked Naval to meditation.

Woah.

This was an interesting insight.

Because if I linked Naval to meditation, what else am I linking together? And how I can purposely link things together for my own benefit to produce greater habits and a stronger life?

What Is Linking?

On the Internet, links are used to connect one site to the next. Most webpages link to others, which can create an endless “rabbit hole” for you to explore on the Internet.

Weirdly enough, our mind does this too.

Our mind has one thought (one webpage) which takes us to another thought (another webpage). This leads us to think about something new (a separate webpage). All of a sudden, we’ve played telephone to the point where we’re thinking of something completely unrelated to that first thought.

We are linking all the time.

Constantly.

In action, it might look like this:

*Checks phone* Wow, nobody texted me. I guess nobody is thinking of me. I guess nobody likes me. I guess I’m lonely. I guess I’m going to die alone.

Yes, it sounds crazy, when it’s written out.

But this is what our mind does. Sometimes you’re in a loop you didn’t start and can’t control.

It’s because our mind is always looking for links.

Morning Routine

If you can link positive habits together in the morning, you can start your day on the right foot. Then, after your Morning Routine is over, you can start linking positive thoughts together instead of negative ones. This creates a chain that could lead you down a completely different day which can lead you to a different week, to a month, to a different year, to a different life.

I could get lost in social media all day.

I was conditioned to was check my notifications and text messages first thing in the morning. I’ve since learned this puts me in a reactive state to start the day.

My mind is ready to attach to any thought loop and go down that rabbit hole in the morning. So why not make those thoughts positive and empowering?

Here’s another reason for a Morning Routine: We have been least influenced by the world around us when we wake up. You haven’t spent any time on social media, listening to your friends, or watching the news. This means you can effectively brainwash yourself. And it’s important to do so by linking the morning together.

Linking the Morning Together

Professional athletes warm-up for games. If your life is a game, why wouldn’t you want to prime yourself for it?

Not only does a Morning Routine help us link together positive day, it also helps us complete the Morning Routine itself.

I’ve created some useful links that help me create the type of day I want to create. Feel free to use these, disregard them, or enjoy them:

Waking up in the morning to drinking water.

When I wake up in the morning, the first thing I often realize is… “Damn, I’m thirsty.” My phone is in a different room (if it was available for me to grab, I would). That water brings some life back into me. It wakes me up a little bit. But, I’m still not fully there.

That first sip to Wim Hof breathing.

Wim Hof breathing is awesome. It takes about 10-15 minutes and it really wakes me up. After I’ve completed my Wim Hof breathing, I’ve convinced myself the only appropriate task to do is meditate.

Wim Hof breathing to meditation

Meditation stills the mind (similar to Wim Hof breathing) and allows me to watch my brain work for 10-20 minutes. Tapping into nothingness is key to create anything.

Meditation to visualization

Visualization primes your mind to experience the world you would like to see. There’s a reason why visualization is so common amongst the world’s most successful people. It’s because it works.

*

These all take about 30-45 minutes. I only need to wake up and drink water to set this whole process in motion, because I’ve linked one routine to the next. The less thinking, the better.

Links To Create

Linking is an excellent way to control your morning, but it’s not the only time you can use it to your advantage. You can use it throughout the day to maximize your enjoyment from life.

Walking through doors to high energy – I got this one from Tej Dosa. Think about how many doors you walk through throughout the day – whether it be your bedroom, bathroom, or front door. If you linked “high energy” to walking through these doors, how much brighter would your life experience be? It’s simple and effective.

Brushing your teeth to a personal affirmation – Post a personal affirmation on the mirror to your bathroom, that way you’re guaranteed to see it at least twice daily.

Hot beverage to writing – I’m currently working on my writing habit. So, it’s helpful to have a trigger. I’ve settled with a coffee or tea. If I have one of these in my hand, it reminds me that it’s time to write.

Links to Destroy

Waking up to checking my phone – As previously discussed, this link was a potent one because it set me up to experience the day someone else wanted me to have. Now I use my phone as a tool to reward myself after having completed what I was supposed to for the day.

Checking my phone within an hour of bed – For years, I’ve had trouble with my sleep. One of the reasons why, is my mind goes seemingly endless thought loops. This is likely because I’ve put so much stuff into my brain.

Opening web browser to social media – One of my least helpful habits I have is immediately typing in “tw” for twitter.com or “fa” for facebook.com or “gm” for gmail.com. These have happened over time. In order to help myself with these links, I’m currently playing around with the app called Freedom. Freedom can block websites and apps you don’t want to use for set amounts of time. I have blocked a bunch of sites I use to procrastinate. Occasionally, it blocks a useful research link I might want to check out, but so far it’s saved me far more often than it hurt me.

The point is to notice if you do anything often, you can use that opportunity to improve your life in some way by linking.

*

We have so many links throughout the day. If you practice the art of watching your mind think (meditation), you can potentially pick up on these and make the necessary adjustments.

A good clue is when you ask yourself: “Wow, where did all that time go?”

As algorithms have gotten stronger to keep you on platforms, it’s important – more than ever – to use your own links to create the day you want to create.

This is about recapturing your life to make sure you’re living the way you want to be living.

If you don’t control your life, someone else will.

P.S. If you have any useful links to share, drop them down below!

Filed Under: Habits

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